2022 - Issue 40 - Halloween

It’s no trick! This week’s Roundup is filled with spooktacular suggestions to help you find the scares and nightmares hidden in your favourite London art haunts… and a few other Halloween themed treats. Enjoy!


The Horror Show!

This collection of curiosities from the past five decades is so eclectically British it could have been curated by Bill Bryson. Arranged mostly chronologically, there’s a loose attempt to link everything together and to the politics of each era. With such a wide range, though, it often feels forced. This is where Bryson could have really helped. But since the overly elaborate wall text font is so hard to read in the spookily lit exhibit you probably won’t even notice. Which is fine, because there’s more than enough weird, scary, historical and sometimes sexual objects to make the £16.50 adult ticket price feel justified.

The Horror Show’ at Somerset House (@somersethouse) until 19 Feb 2023


Permanent Scares

All Hallows' Eve comes round once a year, but that doesn’t mean you can’t find ways to be scared in London all year round. Riding the Central Line and the constantly rising price of a pint come to mind — but I know my readers would prefer something a bit more artsy, and free!

Here’s my selection of the scariest works of art in the permanent collection at each of London’s major museums, along with a quick synopsis of the spookiest place where you can see some contemporary exhibits. By this time next year, I fully expect you to have ticked them all off of your (candy) bucket list.

Happy… hunting? [Insert evil laugh here.]

💀

Judith in the Tent of Holofernes (about 1622)

by Johann Liss (about 1595-1631)

Skulls and beheadings are a dime a dozen in the classical arts, but it’s not that often you see Tarantino-level blood spurts. This painting is a particularly gruesome depiction of a Biblical story about a strong woman that is often used by artists to explore power dynamics and gender identity. Four hundred years later those topics still prove scary for far too many, but at least we’ve become desensitised to the gore.

At the National Galleryview their artwork info page to learn more.

😈

Three Studies for Figures at the Base of a Crucifixion (c.1944)

by Francis Bacon (1909-1992)

You’re never quite sure what Bacon’s inhuman figures actually are, and it’s hard to form an opinion because they’re almost too disturbing to look at as they scream from the canvas, clearly writhing in pain. In four hundred years time, I suspect they might still be the scariest thing at the Tate Britain.

At the Tate Britainview their artwork info page to learn more.

👻

Fire! Fire! (1963-4)

by Enrico Baj (1924-2003)

This is one of my favourite works in the Tate Modern. It’s a combination of oil paint and Meccano toys applied onto a swatch of woven fabric that looks like it could have been ripped from the old sofa your nan had to get rid of after that traumatic incident with her cat, Mister Muffins. God rest his soul.

At the Tate Modernview their artwork info page to learn more.

☠️

Original Stormtrooper (1977 - 80)

by John Mollo (Designer) and Brian Muir (Designed)

It’s been 45 years since the first Stormtroopers appeared on screen, blasting their way onto the Tantive IV and into the overactive imaginations of young children and sci-fi fans everywhere. This costume in the V&A was worn in the original trilogy, and is a stark reminder of both how imposing they were on screen and how many of these action figures I lost in the sandbox as a child.

At the V&Aview their artwork info page to learn more.

⚰️

Crypt Gallery

The Crypt of St Pancras Parish Church, located across from Euston Station, was used for coffin burials from 1822 to 1854. It was opened as a venue hire in 2002 and it’s brick vaults, random stacks of headstones and Zork-like layout make this one of the most atmospheric locations to see art in London.

Check cryptgallery.org to see what’s on. It’s open year round and there’s a constant stream of short-run shows, frequently featuring emerging artists and recent graduate work. It’s a great place to get a deal on art… if you dare!


Scared Penguins

For some people there’s nothing scarier than a blank page. Artists and writers in particular often find that the hardest part of any work they make is the first step. It’s often easier to edit or erase than it is to create. It helps when you have a topic that’s dear to your heart, and in my case that’s penguins.

I’ve been drawing penguins for almost a decade now, which means my style has refined but I still sometimes struggle to find a topic. Luckily, annual events always provide inspiration. My Halloween ‘treat’ for you is a selection of ten recent drawings of penguins being scared. Enjoy!


PLUS — don’t forget to check my What’s On page so you don’t miss any of the other great art shows closing soon.


BONUS: I wrote a parody song.

If there’s scary art

In your neighborhood

Who you gonna call?

Art Roundup!

If there's something weird

And it don't look good

Who you gonna call?

Art Roundup!

I ain't 'fraid of no art

I ain't 'fraid of no art

For the galleries

And the museums

Who can you call?

Art Roundup!

Confusing abstract works

Messin’ with your head

Ow, who you gonna call?

Art Roundup!

I ain't 'fraid of Pollock

I ain't 'fraid of Rothko

Who you gonna call?

Art Roundup!

If you're all alone

Grab your smart phone

And check

Art Roundup!

Lemme tell ya something

Artin' makes me feel good!

With apologies to Ray Parker Jr.! Watch the original classic video below, and see how many of the early-80s celebs you still recognise. Happy Halloween!


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Lay Down Dream (2007)

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Strange Clay: Ceramics in Contemporary Art